祝我生日快乐

多么想下个铃声响起时出现你的名字
第一次在没有你陪伴下度过
我知道伤心不能改变什么
那么让我诚实一点
诚实难免有不能控制的宣泄
只有关上了门不必理谁
一个人坐
那上千个切掉回忆的画面
眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐
我对自己说
蜡烛点了
寂寞亮了
生日快乐
泪也融了
我要谢谢你给的一切
爱你的
还要时间
才能平衡

祝我生日快乐

温岚助
p/s: 今天唱歌给我听的人 谢谢你 =）

28.06.08

傻傻的。。

最后第二天

你昨天的陪伴 让我真的好多了 （谢谢，珊）
今天一个人呆在家 望着慢转的时间
上网读部落格 让自己别想太多近来发生的事
甚至逼自己回想 那个人写过的无情
反复地读了一篇又一篇
好让自己能够真正的对他死心
更新图片 删除资料 抹去着回忆
想彻底地把他给忘记
但我还是办不到
我到底怎么了 别人也都笑我傻瓜
当一切早已结束时 过去的事是不可能再从来的
这句话我现在才了解
请别再给我假希望
我真的 累了

I love you hero

It’s already the third day, I still cannot accept what had already happen. The lovely king had leaved far away from us. Out of sudden everything seems so difficult to me. His emperor is falling down. His beloved queen is broken down. She look strong but she are not. I never see her cry like this before. She never stops crying since that day onward. Her eyes are always red. Prince and I promise, we will not cry infront of her anymore. She thinks a lot when we are not around. Her tears will start to drop. We always try to talk with her whenever she looks unstable. Ask her this and that act like a small child, just to distract and keep her from thinking too much. But she still will cry alone when we are not there with her. Sometime I do not know what else to say. I cannot do anything more than that. I feel so helpless. I cry out too. My heart is so pain, like someone is tearing it out. I scare I cannot stand on my own anymore. Act like I can make it through infront of her. I feel tire sometime. I know all my buddies are backing me up here. I am trying to be strong. But it’s really tough. I would like to thanks all my dear friends. I really do appreciate it. Even the one who finally show up. I do not dare to look at him. I do not know what to say. But deep inside my heart, I feel more depress. If I can only speak or get to see him on that occasion, I wish, I wish never ever get to see him for the rest of my life. Forever. I did not plan to tell him what happen. I suddenly feel like listen to his voice on that minute. Surprisingly, he called me after the message. I cannot believe it. When he spoke to me I know he already knew what happen. That’s why he will call. My tears are pumping out again. I cannot stop. I am numb. In my though “He’s just pitying me”. For him, it’s just a courtesy. There are too many things happen to me recently. I have made many big decisions. Mostly are wrong some are correct I think. Maybe I should let the king to make all the decision for me. He will always be the super hero when I need help. I know he will be there when I need him. I believe.

p/s: I love you

Ain't no dream

27^th of July 2008 5.26am, I had received a call from my cousin sister. I was awake. She asked me to pack my belonging and get ready to the airport around 7. She had booked me an air ticket because she said my father had just been admitted to the hospital. I cannot believe what have heard. Gosh, it’s not a dream. My father is having a heart attack. It’s the second times he stay at the hospital because of heart disease.

I cried out, the tears were pumping out. My hand was shaking while packing my things into the luggage. I do not know how to get to the airport, did not know exactly who will be fetching me but I keep packing. My friend woke up. I told her the situation and she helped me call a car. All the way to the airport, I can feel the tears are still hanging around inside my eyes. How can it be? Yesterday we just messaged each other. He told me he had post me the notes and Monday I will get all the notes plus a cute teddy bear for me. Though the teddy was just a joke, but I was so delight. My daddy is so cute.

The uncle who fetch did not want money from me. He knew why I am rushing to the airport early in the morning. Thank you, uncle. I really appreciate a lot. I reached the airport. I reach early. I’m sitting down waiting to check in. My mind was so blank then I start to think a lot. I scare to call my family again. My mom did not switch on her phone. I wish there is someone I can talk with. I even think of him. So, I start typing. This is the only way to stop me from over thinking or being negative. It’s now 7.12am. My plane will be departing on 9.45am and landing on 12.15pm. What I can do is just waiting. I will soon back to K.L. I love you dad.

p/s: i love you

Dream of you again..

My dreams are all about you recently

All our past tense memories came to me

Nightmare had found the way in

The thing that I always afraid of

You act like I'm annoying to you

Your words are so cruel and cold

like snowstorm starting to fall

how can I hope to stand?

there is the blizzard waiting to give me the knockout blow

Crying out with no tears

I don’t really know you anymore

Gosh, it’s a dream..